I Second That Emotion.....

If we all really pay attention we would find that a major component of our human experience is emotion. Virtually everything we do generates an emotion. Sit in a comfortable chair and we feel relaxed. Jump in a hot shower and we feel comforted. Hugging a puppy makes us feel good. Being unexpectedly hugged by someone who has just run ten miles makes us feel gross. Your boyfriend forgets your birthday and you feel sad and maybe mad. Name the experience and an emotion will be attached to it, even if it is no more noticeable than a whisper. If emotion is such a large part of our human existence it would follow that maybe it is important to understand what it really is. Let me start out by saying what emotion is not. Emotion is not a reaction. Your sadness that your husband forgot your birthday is not a reaction to his forgetting your birthday even though it appears so. He is not the cause of your emotion. He is the Trigger to release what you are subjectively experiencing in that moment.

So, if emotion is not a reaction, as in an effect of a cause, then what is it? Drum roll please… EMOTION IS A COMMUNICATION. Did I hear someone say, Huh? Emotion is a two part communication that is telling you something about you in that moment. The first part is the signal, or what we used to call the emotion itself. The signal is the feeling; sad, mad, glad, jealous, frustration, joy, depression, hate, love……. These are all signals alerting us to the communication that we have just received. The feeling is NOT the communication, just as the phone ringing is not the message. Signals/feelings are alerting devices, and in this case the feeling alerts us to the message we have just received. The message offers thought (our translator) precise information regarding what we have generated subjectively (inwardly) in that moment that the signal appeared. Let me back up a bit.

We, as humans, incorporate both a subjective and an objective awareness. They work in harmony, which means one does NOT follow the other, just as emotion is not a reaction. Subjective awareness represents our inner world, which is literal, and the objective awareness represents our outer world, which is a symbolic representation of the subjective. Objective imagery is just as symbolic as our dream imagery. OK. Let’s say in one particular moment the subjective awareness is experiencing a non-acceptance of self. This is quite literal. “I do not like myself very much in this moment.” You can’t get much clearer than that. In exactly the same moment that I am subjectively experiencing a non-acceptance of myself the objective awareness is projecting outwardly through perception a ‘real world’ scenario to represent that subjective non-acceptance of self. You may fail at folding an origami properly and judge yourself. “I suck at this.” Your husband might break wind at the dinner table and you judge him. Remember, to judge another is a reflection of your judgment of self. The objective awareness can create an infinite number of outer manifestations to represent the same literal subjective state.

If we but only pay attention, emotion can be a precise communication, identifying what belief is operative in the moment that you are actually experiencing the emotion. The feeling, again, is not the communication, but rather the signal that we are receiving a communication from our subjective awareness. Why is it important to know the belief that is operative in the moment? Because our beliefs influence perception and our perception creates our objective reality. The signal or feeling is there simply to get our attention. So, if embarrassment is the knock on the door or the ring of the phone, then what might the communication be? Let’s pick up the phone and answer the door and look at an example.

You’re at a formal sit-down dinner and you drop a hunk of gravy laden pork on your white chiffon dress. You get the signal (embarrassment) that you have received a communication from your subjective awareness. The signal is supposed to snap your attention back onto yourself. The communication comes by way of the objective awareness, which created the experience of the dropped pork. Embarrassment is NOT the communication. In the moment that the pork dropped on your dress leaving a big brown stain your subjective awareness was feeling inadequate, clumsy, stupid and judgmental about Self. Why? Our beliefs will tell us why. What are the beliefs that create the feeling of embarrassment? There are probably many and they may differ for each of us, but let’s look at a few. One might be that dropping food on yourself is the sign of a slob. Another might be that people think poorly of slobs. Here, one belief influences another. Another belief might be that drooping food on yourself is indicative of a careless person. Another might be that only children drop food on themselves. When you automatically feel embarrassment then you have turned these beliefs into absolutes. They have become your truths even though they are not true. And when we don’t recognize our individual truths we eliminate choice. We act automatically. Acting automatically is a clear sign that you have turned a belief into an absolute.

The point I wish to make in all this is that if we pay attention to what we do in the moment, that moment carries a treasure trove of information about ourselves and what beliefs we are feeding into the film projector called perception. If you continue to believe that emotion is a reaction then you will continue to give our interpreter, which is thought, inadequate information. All that you experience is a
reflection of you. All that is needed is the opening of our eyes. We draw others to us to trigger what is in US so that we may view it outwardly. So the next time your hubby forgets your birthday, thank him for being a willing player in a communication you have configured for your own enlightenment. Or, you can choose to continue in your old ways, blame him for not caring about you, and learn nothing about yourself. Choice is freedom.
Bill Marshall