Conflict and Choice

If you’ve read my recent blogs you may have gotten the sense that we can live this life without conflict. This isn’t so, because many of us choose conflict. It has the tendency to move us like equanimity cannot. There are Drama Queens and Kings. We all know a few or we may be one ourselves. It is the judgment we place on the conflict that puts us at unease.

The conflict may be created to get us to notice ourselves in the moment we create it, or we may create it to unstick ourselves from our stuck place. If we don’t move then the conflict will be produced again only with a stronger knock at the door. In The Forgotten Self, my novel about a shift in consciousness, one of the characters is kidnapped in the middle east where he suffers a body wasting disease while in captivity. Eventually he comes to realize why he created this conflict and trauma in his life by paying attention to what he was creating. He had a huge secret that was eating him alive.

We all keep secrets about things that we feel others will judge us over. The reality is that we keep the secrets because we judge ourselves. If others only knew what a bad person I really am I wouldn’t have any friends. Within spirit, let’s call it our ESSENCE, there are no secrets. It is only in this one small focus of attention that I call myself "me" that I feel I must hide. If I fully accepted myself then there would be no need for secrets. SECRETS, therefore, are an indication, or a communication to myself, that in the moment that I consciously hide something, that I am not accepting of myself. Remember, acceptance means non-judgment.

If I do not pay attention to what I am creating outwardly as a communication to myself, then I will create the same message over and over in different objective forms. When I finally get the communication, which usually involves non-acceptance, then I will no longer need to create the outer objective manifestation. Of course, I always have the opportunity to not accept, in which case I will again create a wee bit of conflict.

Conflict and trauma is a communication to SELF that we are not accepting and/or not paying attention to self in the moment. SOOOOOO, quit the blame, shame and victim game and conflict and trauma will begin to lose it’s grip on your life. You create it. You can undo it.
Bill Marshall